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November 19th, 2003

grrr, writer's block

I have a fucking hour-long talk I have to give tomorrow afternoon, and I"ve spent all afternoon trying to slide-ify my outline. And I am just getting nowhere. And it's really pissing me off.

Part of it is that this is a persuasive talk, and I already know my audience doesn't really want to hear what I'll have to say, and I've said it all before anyway, and I'm sorry that the campus doesn't have enough money to build the network that everyone wants and I'm sorry that we don't believe in the "haves and have nots" model of enterprise networking, and I just can't get motivated to get ready to get up there again.

Being kind of mopey and depressed doesn't help, either.

Late night, I suppose. At least I got sufficient sleep last night.

I want to be walking on a long beach somewhere, on a mild fall day, with a deep blue sky and alternately feeling the warm sand and the cool water on my toes.

meme goodness

First real kiss: hmmm, would have to be a chick I met at a party in the large corner suite of my dorm floor. I have forgotten her name. I do remember Donna Hamelman, though. I think she was next.

First job: a shitty data entry position on an IBM System/36 at Modagrafics in the Chicago suburbs.

First screen name: Tuna

First self-purchased album: Rise, a discoish jazzy thing by Herb Alpert. Around 1980.

First Funeral: First one I remember was my dad's mom. Something tells me there must have been earlier ones, but I have no memory of them.

First pets: A mail-order Carolina Anole

First piercing: Jill Smith got me drunk and then took me to the Claire's or whatever at the mall for a stud in my left ear. I could never keep it from getting infected until I replaced it with a hoop.

First true love: Rita, of course.

First big trip: First one I remember is an airplane trip down to Florida to visit grandma and grandpa

First musician heard in the house: Don't remember, but it would have to be something classical. Dad didn't tolerate anything else.

Last big car ride: To Seattle and back, this past summer, to move Kate home from her internship

Last kiss: Presumably this morning when saying goodbye to Kate

Last good cry: A couple of years ago, after having a beer with Greg, I was inexplicably overcome with sadness that Sandy was dead and then completely lost it when I got home. Full-out lie on the kitchen floor and sob, sob, sob. I miss her. I still cry when I think of her, but that was the last "good" one.

Last movie seen: I watched Aliens on the Tivo a few days ago. I think the last movie I saw for the first time was Frida

Last beverage drank: I'm currently drinking a cup of coffee

Last food consumed: a not particularly good hamburger at Joe's

Last phone call: Kate called me to check in about an hour ago

Last TV show watched: Last night's new episode of "Queer Eye"

Last shoes worn: I had to put my sandals on to get into Joe's to eat dinner tonight

Last CD played: Liz Phair, "Selections from Exile In Guyville and Whip-Smart"

Last item bought: I don't remember. Something this past weekend for mom's party, probably

Last disappointment: not sure about this. Probably just that my house is still falling apart and that I"m still not, apparently, doing anything about it.

Last soda drank: yesterday at lunch, a pepsi

Last ice cream eaten: probably the ill-fated departmental ice cream social last Thursday

Last shirt worn: a purple and black flannel

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Charley

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